All the Things You Never Knew Read online

“Why are you here?” she hissed, trying to sound as furious as she could. “Didn’t I tell you to get out of my life?”

  “I did,” Leon answered. He looked a bit dazed, and smells like…whiskey and whatever alcohol beverage it was that he had drank.

  “I did,” he said again, pushing himself up onto the windowsill. “But I’m back. I’m back for good, Rose.”

  She arched an eyebrow at him. “Are you?”

  “I haven’t yet done anything…May I get in first instead of hanging out here? Someone might see me,” he said, raising a hand to his head. “And damn if I’m not getting a headache.”

  A smile tug at Rose’s lips as she move aside and let Leon fell through the window onto the floor. He was an ass. Always had been one. She just can’t seem to stay mad at him long enough.

  She knows she should really push him back out to prevent a scandal from erupting, but thought not.

  She needs him, whether she admits it or not.

  “Look, Rose,” he began as he stood up from the ground and adjusted his crooked cravat, which really has no point because it was still off to the side. “I need to talk to you.”

  “About what?” she asked, moving off to her bed, which was a total mistake because Leon was coming right after and the feelings she had wasn’t good.

  “Don’t worry. I’m not here to ravish you or anything,” he said. It was as if he was reading her mind.

  “I wasn’t thinking of that or anything,” she answered, which was the truth, if not fully.

  “I have decided…” He cupped his head with a wince and fell on her bed.

  “What the–” She quickly move to her feet and swat at his arm. “What do you think you’re doing? Get off!”

  “I need to rest,” he murmured. “I ran here and I don’t feel good.”

  “Of course, you don’t. You have the distasteful smell of alcohol and whatever else,” she said, settling down next to him.

  He turned onto his back and looked at her. “You’re not mad anymore, are you?”

  Rose flushed at his gaze and shook her head. “No.” She was earlier, but how could she now with him here so…charmingly inebriated?

  “Then do you have time to listen to my ‘intentions’? You asked me earlier,” he said, swinging an arm over her lap.

  “Your intentions?”

  He smiled crookedly at her and rose up, pinning her down on the bed.

  “Leon!” she cried, trying to push him away. “Get off me! What’s wrong with you?”

  “Shhh…” He put a finger to her lips and rested his head on her chest. “I need this…so I can talk.”

  “Get off me!” she snapped.

  He covered her mouth with his hand and told her, “Sh” again.

  “You’re too loud, Rose. Please be quiet.”

  “You–” Rose flinched away, and finally gave up. “Fine. Your intentions? Make it quick.”

  He smiled and sniffed into her hair. “Good girl.”

  God, what is wrong with him? He couldn’t be that foxed, could he? And what is wrong with her?

  It wrecks her nerve so to be pinned under Leon like this. She could hear her heart beating wildly within her chest against his. Surely he could hear it, too, from the silence of the night.

  “Rose,” Leon murmured, nuzzling her neck. “I’m sorry.”

  Sorry?

  “About?”

  “Everything…from that day…I left you.”

  “And you’re telling me this now because…?”

  “Look.” He sat up and pulled her into his arms, embracing her warmly. “I know you were mad earlier, and I understand.”

  “And your point is?”

  Leon sighed, and turned her face to look at him. “I want to tell you, love, that my intentions were far from Lansing’s and that you shouldn’t be mad at me anymore.”

  Love?

  “Whatever. You are just like him.”

  A light chuckle escaped him, and he flicked at her nose. “No. I didn’t do it on purpose.”

  “You…didn’t?”

  Quite unbelievable.

  “I did it…only to make you let go.”

  “What!” Indignation struck her suddenly and she pushed him off. “Why did you?”

  “You don’t understand.”

  “I will never understand if you don’t explain your little behind right now, Mister!”

  “You’re quite demanding.”

  Why, of course! She has to be demanding now! She wanted to know why, didn’t she? Might as well make him explain it. But how would she know if it was a jest or not?

  “I know you wouldn’t believe it, Rose. I know women don’t ever believe a man when they say this after so many wrongs, but I have to say it,” Leon said, running his hand through her hair. “I have to. I have many things to say, but let this be the first.” He gazed into her eyes once more and gently pushed her back down on the bed. “Because I love you.”

  “You…what?”

  His mouth met hers, and all thoughts were lost.

  Because I love you…

  Leon didn’t know if telling Rose so was a lapse or not. But hell, he would be lying to himself if he denies it because deep down, he knows that Rose had always been his love. The one he had wanted all along. The future of his life. If only he can make room for her to fit in.

  His family was too dangerous for her to be a part of with all the enigmatic foes lurking around. There were five suspects he had been looking for, but there could be many others in their association that could cause a series of rampage. He doesn’t want Rose to feel insecure or be endangered in anyway.

  Despite how many times Leon told himself that, he still can’t restrain himself from desiring her. He had promised not to violate her, but it seems he’s doing exactly that. He can’t hold himself back. Not today, tomorrow, now, not ever!

  He doesn’t know if it’s the four bottle of whiskey he had chugged down earlier before he came that is making him reveal himself or his own truthful heart that is speaking. No. Definitely not his truthful heart. For one thing’s for sure, it’s not being true. It has never been. But with Rose, the truth is what he wants to spill.

  “Rose,” he murmured against her lips. It’s been so long. Too long. He hadn’t kiss a mouth this pleasant ever since their break up. How he misses her so. Miss her with all his heart. She just doesn’t know how long he had endured the tedious life scavenging and hoping for the end of his adversity. Or how long he had waited to finally have the opportunity to face her once more.

  “What did you say again?” Rose asked him, breathlessly moving her mouth away from his.

  “Because I love you,” Leon repeated again. He said it so naturally without any hesitation at all.

  It must really have been the whiskey.

  “I don’t believe you,” she said, turning loose from him. “If you do, you wouldn’t have done that to me.”

  “Rose, I–” He doesn’t know how to say this. Trying his best to prevent her from getting enrage he added, “Please believe me on this before anything else. I did not lay one finger on that woman the day you caught us together.”

  He saw her flinch away in pain and move over to cradle her again.

  “I know it sounds like a sham to you since I was half–” he hesitated but went on– “–since I was half… dressed, but I swear I never took her on or anything else,” he told her, grimacing as he feel a sharp aching pain to the side of his head.

  “Leon, are you–”

  “I’m f-fine,” he winced as Rose’s hand came over his head. Leon feels bliss to still have her care for him after he had hurt and deceived her.

  “How much did you drink anyway?” she asked, lightly massaging the side of his head. “Hasn’t been more than an hour since we–”

  “Can you not do that please?” he said, moving her hand away. As much as he enjoys her touch, the pain was afflicting too much. He probably went over his limit today taking down four bottles of Scotch whiskey. It seems to be goin
g into his head and impairing his vision as she touches his head.

  “I think I need to leave,” he said, rolling to his feet and slightly swaying back. Now doesn’t seem to be such a good time for him to speak, though probably it’s the easiest since liquor tends to get the truth out of him.

  “Already?” she sounded rather disappointed. “You haven’t quite yet explain–”

  He shook his head to straighten his sight. “Wrong timing,” he said, walking off to the open window he had come through. “Promise me you would consider what I had said and not let the past haunt you anymore. And please–”–he looked into her eyes and lift a foot out the window– “Please don’t marry Lansing,” he said unexpectedly.

  The damn Scotch.

  “Leon.” Rose walked over to him and gently cupped his face. “Are you sure you could get home?”

  Was she even listening to him?

  “I was able to get here; I should be able to return as well.”

  “Sure. I don’t want you here any longer,” she said to him.

  Total lie, he can tell.

  He could never understand Rose. He could tell that she wants him to stay. Why does she have to deny it? The kiss they had just share, she had been willing to give it to him.

  Women are so hard to understand. You give them pleasure and they reject it all at the end.

  It’s to Leon’s advantage now to leave and clear his head before it gets worse. For some reason, he feels as if he’s going to start up a really regretful speech if he stays any longer with Rose. All the things he never wanted to say would come out. With Rose, secrets are hard to hide away. Right now he just wanted to tell her everything–of all the things she never knew. Every little secret of his life, his mission, his family–all the things on his mind.

  “Sorry, Rose,” he said, reaching out to take her hand. “I’ll finish everything we have started tonight when my duty is over. Please, just don’t marry that Lansing.”

  “Why–”

  He cut her off with a brief kiss and slid off the windowsill and out into the night.

  Rose touched her lips and watches as Leon clumsily slid out of her window and crept out into the darkness. She could still taste and feel the imprint of his lips on hers. It had been so long since she’d been kissed. Even Lord Lansing didn’t get the opportunity yet to kiss her like Leon.

  Because I love you…

  Those words shined on Rose like the rays of a glowing sun on a midsummer morning. Did he really mean it?

  Lord Lansing had told her the same, but it hadn’t meant this much to her.

  And why didn’t Leon finish telling her of his intentions?

  So many questions were rising to her head.

  Why did he tell her not to marry Lord Lansing? He didn’t seem to care before. He even said he wasn’t going to attend her wedding. What has gotten into him now? Was it because he had too much to drink? She knows he can get a little tick off when he’s drunk and speak of unexpected things. His ‘I love you’ probably didn’t mean as much as she’d hope either. It’s best if she doesn’t raise her hopes so high, but that’s highly impossible because since his return, all she can ever think about is him and everything that they had shared in the past. All anger had seemed to vanish. It does spark back at times but she’s not as infuriated as she had been back then.

  Don’t marry that Lansing…

  Lansing. Rose still has to deal with his lordship. For sure he’s going to call upon her on the morrow. She can’t decide on what to do now about their engagement.

  He sure wasn’t as faithful as he had claimed to be.

  No man is ever faithful, she reminded herself.

  Walking back to her bed, Rose slowly lies down and closed her eyes to think. Her marriage with Lord Lansing was to take place in three months. She was most delighted to wed him before Leon showed up and turned everything around. She has to delay it, for she can’t fully make a vow at the altar that her heart is contradicting with. Tomorrow if Lord Lansing comes, if he dares, that is, she would work it out with him. There’s shouldn’t be a rush in the marriage. Plus, there’s plenty of time to spare.

  Susannah was probably right.

  Her heart could still change.

  Leon’s back, you know, the most maddening part of her mind spoke. She knows he’s back that’s why everything was so difficult. Her life and decisions would have been so much easier if he hadn’t. Perhaps if he had been more open, everything would have been all right.

  Why can’t he just be truthful and share his thoughts with her? No matter what happens, no matter what the hardship is, no matter the price, she will pay just to know what’s inside his heart and what he truly wishes. Everything in the past, she’s able to forget as long as he is honest with her. Madness comes and goes, but it doesn’t stay forever. She can live up to meet his criteria if she wishes, whether he likes it or not.

  Yes! A brilliant idea came to her. She would try to make Leon reveal himself. She knows he is hiding something with those understatements that he never clearly goes into explicit details. She would use the Marquess of Lansing to resent him. If he really cares and love her like he had said, everything should go smoothly.

  Rose smiled to herself again and pulled the cover under her chin.

  She had denied Leon of everything but a part of her heart is still open.

  Hargate Inn

  “I’ve tried,” Leon said, falling exhaustingly onto the bed with a grunt. “I need to sleep.”

  “Whoever told you to drink so much?” said Longsword, as he flip through another old Times paper. “You won’t be able to tell Lady Rose anything with that head.”

  He had told her the most important thing though.

  “It’s late anyway,” said Hargate. “Time to get a good night’s sleep. It’s nearly two in the morning.”

  “Sure.” And before Leon knew it, he was off into the darkness.

  The Duke of Hargate and Earl of Longsword left the room to which Leon slept in, and went out into the hall.

  Hargate Inn was usually a busy and crowded place but tonight it seems to be more on the down side and relaxing.

  “We did try our best to get Heartily and Lady Rose back together,” said Longsword as they walk into the salon. “Though our– or rather your technique wasn’t as successful as we had predicted, it was well worth it.”

  Hargate sighed, and hung his head wearily as he sat down on the couch. “I guess everything should be all right.”

  “You sound a little despairing, what’s wrong?” Longsword asked, settling down on the couch across from Hargate.

  “Nothing,” he replied, rubbing his forehead. “Gareth, do you think you could help Leon on with Lansing’s case for a couple days? I have some businesses to tend.”

  “Businesses? Like what? Need Heartily and I to come along?”

  “No,” Hargate shook his head. “It’s…part of my role in the House of Lords.”

  “House of Lords, huh? If that’s the case then good luck.”

  “Thanks,” Hargate answered, and flip out his pocket watch to check the time. “I think I’m going to skip sleep tonight and go out on my mission from the Lords,” he said, getting up.

  “Why not wait till tomorrow?” Longsword asked.

  “I want to get it over with,” Hargate replied. “Tell Heartily tomorrow that I’ll be back in a fortnight or two.”

  “It’s that big of a deal?”

  “Yes.”

  “Heartily just got back, and now you’re leaving. Makes me feel like an idler with nothing much on my case.”

  “You can always go out to search for more countesses,” Hargate put in helpfully with a smile.

  “I have decided to give up on that,” Longsword answered with a breath of resignation. “There are no women that would meet my criteria.”

  “Really?” Hargate arched an eyebrow at him and laughed. “Interesting. Didn’t know you have set qualities for women.”

  “No, not women. A bride, actually,�
� Longsword said.

  “Matters not.”

  “So you’re heading out?”

  “Yes.” Hargate fixed on his waistcoat and tidy up his cravat. “It’s a quarter pass three so I must get moving.”

  “I totally hate you and Leon for leaving me all the time, Laguna. But all right. I’ll see you soon then.”

  “Please call upon me if there’s any emergency. I promise to make it in a flash.”

  “Got it.”

  With a nod of farewell, Hargate grabbed his hat from the stand by the window and slipped out, leaving Longsword behind.

  “How are you feeling?” the earl asked Leon the next morning as they sat down for breakfast in the dining room of Hargate Inn.

  “Much better,” he replied, taking a drink of his cup of water. Alcohol is not in his favor at the moment after last night. “Where’s Laguna this morning?” he asked, when he realize that Hargate didn’t rise to join them.

  “He said he had some business to deal with through the House of Lords,” Longsword replied, taking a bite out of his buttered toast. “He said he will be back in a fortnight or two.”

  “That’s way too long,” Leon replied, rubbing the side of his head.

  “He said he will make it if we have any emergency,” Longsword added. “Besides, aren’t we going to take one step at a time to obliterate that marquess?”

  Leon thought about it for a moment and replied, “I guess.” He still hasn’t explained everything to Rose to get her to understand his intentions; slowing down the mission a bit won’t hurt as long as he knows where his target was.

  “So, what to do today?” Longsword asked. “Any plan?”

  “Plan?” Leon had thought of going back to explain everything to Rose, and this time finish it before leaving. Instead of saying so, he just shook his head. “Nothing at the moment.”

  “I’m thinking I should return to Somerset for a couple of days to check on my estate,” Longsword said after a while. “Since you still have to go through the ‘amorous’ process of your mission, I figure it should be fine.”

  “Of course,” Leon nodded. “And besides, you are an earl after all. A bastard like me can’t be keeping you around.”

  “You are not a bastard,” Longsword declined. “Technically, yes; but in truth, no.”